Shepherd Rebecca’s Story
I was in a very charismatic context this weekend. There was a woman there who told me about how she had just met Jesus and was now filled with euphoria and feelings of happiness. She’d had a fantastic and fast conversion from her former life and was now one with God. It was incredible to hear her testimony and hear how God had totally transformed her life since meeting Him. She now saw miracles wherever she went, and how every biblical text and situation now spoke to her through God.
Sometimes I get asked about how and when I came to faith. But it has been different for me. I cannot say a definite date and time. I have grown up in a Christian family and I have always carried with me my faith in God. It has always been there as a natural part of my life. When I hear about others’ radical meeting with God and the miracles that happens to them, I think to myself: “What about me?” I begin to question my own path to God. Because it is rare to hear about the less life transforming testimonies.
Instead, my walk with God has been long and bumpy. From having taken Him for granted and fallen into the valley of death, to being rescued by God and delivered from despair, only to tremble once again and fall deep down and then climbing back up by the grace of God. It’s been more like a roller coaster ride. But during all this time, I have always had my foundational belief in Him. I did always pray to Him in the depth of my despair. I did go to church now and again. And now afterwards, I can see how He worked with me at that time. I needed to shatter myself in to pieces entirely, to understand my everlasting need of a savior – of Christ.
My relationship with God has been a long process, which does not bother me now because I am in it for eternity. Just in the recent year, I have experienced a great shift in my sanctification. I’m feeling God’s presence growing stronger and leading the way for me. Difficult feelings and thoughts have been washed away from me in an incredible way. I have witnessed God’s healing in my life.
What is the most incredible thing of all is that He never left me. He never gave up His hope in me even though I had completely given up hope in myself. I didn’t realize I could start over. I could start over. And only through God was that possible.
I think there are others out there, who cannot say a definite time they were saved. But our faith is just as meaningful. Therefore, I think it is important that we share how we realized God’s mercy, however it went, in order to see and show each other that we are not alone on our journey.
Shepherd Rebecca’s Story